I am not young enough to know everything.
我已经老了，没有足够的时间去了解一切。
I am so clever that sometimes I don’t understand a single word of what I’m saying.
我简直太聪明了，有时连我自己都不知道自己在说什么。
I have made an important discovery…that alcohol, taken in sufficient quantities, produces all the effects of intoxication.
我有一个重大发现——如果摄入足量酒精，就会产生各种陶醉的效果。
I like talking to a brick wall, it's the only thing in the world that never contradicts me.
我喜欢对一堵墙说话，世界上只有它不会反驳我。
I love acting. It is so much more real than life.
我喜欢看戏。与人生相比，戏剧更加真实。
I often take exercise. Why only yesterday I had breakfast in bed.
我经常锻炼。只是昨天我是在床上吃的早饭。
I think that God, in creating Man, somewhat overestimated his ability.
我想，上帝在创造人类时高估了他的能力。
I was working on the proof of one of my poems all morning, and took out a comma. In the afternoon I put it back again.
我整个早上都在校对自己的一首诗，我去掉了一个逗号。下午我又把它加上去了。
Ignorance is like a delicate flower: touch it and the bloom is gone.
无知就像是一朵精致的花朵：摸一下，它就消失了。
It is a very sad thing that nowadays there is so little useless information.
这是一件很悲哀的事——如今几乎没有无用的信息。
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